January 2011
December 2010
My Parents
- Mom: Smoking isn't good for you. Are you ever gonna quit?
- Dad: Did I ever tell you that my grandmother lived to be 100 years old?
- Mom: Well one in a million can smoke and still live that long...
- Dad: No no, she didn't smoke. She minded her own fucking business.
World Lens →
questvisual.com
The world’s first and only language-translating camera program. Available now for only $5, it turns your iPhone into a Spanish-to-English (or vice versa) translator! You can’t tell me that’s not cool.
I Just Had Sex - Lonely Island ft. Akon →
memebase.com
This is my favorite thing in the world…today.
Videogame Phrases and Idioms for Everyday Life - Dorkly Article →
dorkly.com
I’m going to start integrating these into my vocabulary immediately. I advise you do the same.
“Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful.”
—Samuel Johnson
QWOP Is One Of Life's Hardest Activities →
kotaku.com
The game is ridiculously hard and borderline retarded, but it makes for some great laughs…and spawns comedic gold like this video.
Last Night
- Ashtin: GOD I want some dick.
- Brandon: I could help you with that.
- Me: She said "dick", not "vagina".
- Everyone else: -laughter-
- Zack: What're you guys doing?
- Me: Talking about Brandon's vagina.
- Zack: Oh yeah, it's huge and floppy.
O HAI
So I decided to jump on the bandwagon way too late. I think I’m starting to figure out this newfangled technological contraption known as Tumblr, though it bothers me a little that “they” seem to dislike the letter E so much. It’s my favorite vowel (aside from O, of course). And why a period? It’s not a sentence. It’s also lacking a capital letter. So now it’s known as “Tumbler” and not “tumblr.” because my word is law.
I like to post random shit. Random ranting, random pictures, random stupid things my friends say. This is where that randomness will happen, so my friends stop complaining that I clog up their Facebook streams.
Set phasers to Awesome.
WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE INANIMATE OBJECT?
THE CAPS LOCK KEY.
